By Judy Harrow
Counseling is another "art of changing consciousness in accordance with
will," like magic in many ways. Counselors help our clients change their consciousness
and their lives by offering them a "safe space," a time set apart in which
they can examine their lives and reconsider their choices. The change may begin with
consciousness, but it never stops there. When consciousness changes, behavior changes,
and different behavior calls forth different responses. So changing my consciousness
carries the possibility of changing any aspect of my life.
A coven Circle
is another kind of safe space, of set-apart time, in which we can work toward many
kinds of change: healing, and job magic, and closer conscious contact with the Ancient
Ones. The style of the work may be very different, but both the goals and many of
the underlying processes are much the same. Our work as counselors is consistent
and mutually reinforcing with our work as priest/esses.
Willed change can
come hard. Old hurts and old habits block the way. The work may involve facing painful
memories, long buried. It may require the sacrifice of major components of the client's
self image, and significant behavioral risk-taking. Those who experiment with themselves
are vulnerable. They need privacy, especially in a community as small as ours. Pagans
live in a fishbowl. Few would risk such deep self- exploration if their work seems
likely to become common gossip. So a counseling session is like a cast Circle: whatever
is said or done within should normally not be discussed with anyone who was not present.
Safe space is private space.
By tradition, Witches keep secrets. Our commitment
to silence arose as a response to persecution, an effort to protect each other and
our Craft from harm, an implementation of the Wiccan Rede. Confidentiality is still
a survival issue in some places, and part of our community's social contract everywhere.
We are trained to it, bone deep. And we are vowed to it, bound to keep our secrets
by strong spells voluntarily and cooperatively worked between initiate and initiator.
Nothing in nature is so very pure. Although confidentiality is a way of life
for us, we need to understand both the practical risks and the ethical limits. Sometimes
life presents us with hard and tragic choices.
The risks are legal. We'd
like to think that as priest/esses, as clergy, our communications with those who
seek our aid are legally protected, "privileged" communication. We'd like
to believe that our religious status safeguards us, at least, from the threat of
jail. It's not that simple.
In 1994, the members of Iron Oak Coven in Florida
faced a different freedom of religion issue. They fought and won their case - yes
- but had to take a second mortgage on their house to pay their lawyer. What about
those of us who have no house to mortgage? Our legal rights are only made real when
we have the resources and the determination to defend them.
Beyond that,
the legal right of any clergy to remain silent varies from state to state, and with
the type of case. Many states, for example, mandate the reporting of child abuse.
Ten years ago, also in Florida, a fundamentalist Christian minister, Rev. John Mellish,
counseled a child abuser in his congregation. The man subsequently confessed, pled
guilty, and still the court demanded the pastor's testimony. Pastor Mellish refused
on principle, and went to jail for contempt of court, setting an honorable example
for all clergy of all religions. Understand, where the law denies the privilege of
confidential communication to anybody, a Witch cannot claim religious discrimination.
Each of us needs to research what the law actually is where we live, in order
to assess our risks and protect ourselves as best we can. No protection is perfect.
Living by our values is not always comfortable or profitable or even safe, but it
is the meaning of the word "religion."
The risks are legal and
practical, but the limits are ethical. There are a very few, heartbreaking circumstances
in which the Wiccan Rede itself, the heartspring of our religion, might require us
to break silence.
The secular counseling profession has its own strong tradition
of confidentiality. But professional counselors acknowledge clear limits to that
confidentiality, and good reasons for those limits. Witches can learn from this example.
In the early '70's, Tatiana Tarasoff was a student at the University of California.
Another student, obsessed with thoughts of murdering her, sought help at the University
counseling center. The counselor kept silence. Tatiana, unwarned, was later murdered.
Her parents won a wrongful death suit. The California Supreme Court upheld the decision
on appeal (Tarasoff v. Regents of the University of California, 1976)
and so established a legal "duty to warn" in situations of serious danger
to self or others.
Very rarely, a crisis may arise which is truly beyond
our ability to handle within the community. At such times, secular law commands us
to get whatever outside help is needed: a doctor, a firefighter, a cop. Silence then
could leave us legally liable, but that alone is not a good enough reason to break
oath.
Secular law does not own my conscience. I'd far rather be in trouble
with the courts than with the Crone. But where there truly is imminent danger of
serious harm -- then and only then -- I believe that the Rede supersedes the oath.
Silence is merely one application of the Rede. Harmlessness, not silence, is the
core ethic of the Witch.
And how shall we know when the potential for harm
is imminent and serious enough? Here's a guideline: until and unless you are prepared
to look the Crone in the eye, tell Her "yes, I broke my oath, and here's why,"
and accept Her judgement, keep silent.
Copyright © 1996 by Judith
Harrow.
A longer version of this Confidentiality section has just been published
by Judy as 'Tis Evil Luck to Speak of It: Secrecy and the Craft; in Living Between
Two Worlds, edited by Chas. S. Clifton, Llewellyn Publications, 1996.
Home Page/Counseling Index/Basics VII: Confrontation - The Dark Mirror
Last updated June 26, 1998